L'Shanah Tovah!

May your hair, your teeth, your face-lift, your abs, and your stocks not fall.

And may your blood pressure, your triglycerides, your cholesterol. your white blood count and your mortgage (or rent) not rise.

May you get a clean bill of health from your dentist, your cardiologist, your gastroenterologist, your urologist, your proctologist, your podiatrist, your psychiatrist, your plumber, and the IRS.

May you find a way to travel from anywhere to anywhere during rush hour in less than an hour, and (if you drive) when you get there may you find a parking space.

May this Yom Tov find you seated around the dinner table, together with your beloved family and cherished friends, ushering in the Jewish New Year ahead.

May what you see in the mirror delight you, and what others see in you delight them.

May the telemarketers wait to make their sales calls until you finish dinner, may your checkbook and budget balance, and may they include generous amounts for tsedakah (charity).

May you remember to say "I love you" at least once a day to your partner, your child(ren) and your parent(s). You can say it to your secretary, your nurse, your butcher, your photographer, your masseur/masseuse, your seamstress, your hairdresser or your gym instructor, but not with a "twinkle" in your eye.

May we live as intended, in a world at peace with the awareness of the beauty in every sunset, every flower's unfolding petals, every baby's smile and every wonderful, astonishing, miraculous part of ourselves.

May G-d bless you with every happiness, great health, peace and much love during the next year and all those that follow.

-- from and E-mail sent by a (non-Jewish) coworker of mine to every Jewish person he knows. I think this is reworked from at least two or three different rabbi's greetings to congregants quoted in various Rosh Hashana anthologies.

Wishing a good and sweet year to my Jewish brothers and sisters and dear friend of any faith. And Ramadan Mubarak to any Muslim readers. Although I think it's a few days before it starts.

And, of course, lots of fabulous music, especially opera!